What's going through my head:

I never thought I could hate something more than them.

Lyrics *that don't do such a good job* describing my mood atm:

How do you do?
Have yourself, a pleasant afternoon.
Well, fuck you too,
Goodnight's the one I choose, for you!


I'll kill myself,
I'll blow my brains onto the wall.
See you in Hell,
I will not take this anymore.
Now this is where it ends, this is where I will draw the line,
So excuse me while, I end my life.

I will pull this through,
Not having a reason's no excuse.
What the Hell do you,
Suppose that I have left to lose?

I'll kill myself,
I'll blow my brains onto the wall.
See you in Hell,
I will not take this anymore.
Now this is where it ends, this is where I will draw the line,
So excuse me while, I end my life.

[Guitar Solo]

*Spoken* I'll kill myself...
See you in Hell. I'll kill myself.
See you in Hell. I'll kill myself.
See you in Hell. I'll kill myself.
See you in Hell. I'll kill myself.
See you in Hell. I'll kill myself.

I'll kill myself,
I'll blow my brains onto the wall!
See you in Hell,
I will not take this anymore!
This is where it ends,
I put a bullet in my head,
And yes, drop dead.
This is where it ends,
This is where I will draw the line.
Excuse me while....

I kill myself.

~Excuse Me While I Kill Myself -- Sentenced

Entry:

**UPDATE**

This is nothing big, but I just thought I'd say that today, July 4th, makes one year of being a vegetarian. I know, pathetic to be happy about, but it makes me feel accomplished. <3

**END OF UPDATE**


Anyone else notice I do an updating journal about every month? I find it funny, considering how much I'm on here. Ha. At least I don't treat dA like fucking Twitter. If you wanna put up a journal every thirty seconds, go get yourself a fucking twitter account, you twitter whore wanna be. Sorry if I'm like, really snappy towards you if you talk to me, I'm just in the WORST of moods lately. Seriously. I'm surprised I haven't just gone up to the three people pissing me off and screamed "FUCK YOU!" in their faces. Seriously, I hate you guys. Really. I really do. And I never actually hate anything. Sometimes I think I do, but I really don't. I'm in real pain. I need some help, does anyone know of some over the counter anti-depressants I can slip? No, I don't want any of your drugs, I just need an anti-depressant.

Moving on from that subject, I have a dilemma that I'm gonna throw on you guys. I know most of you guys have heard me rant about this on, and on, and on. But I want you guys to well, I want you guys to give me your opinions, because, well honestly, I can't trust my friends' opinions anymore.

Let's say there's this person that I really like. No, not like, I love this person. Now we tried dating, but it only lasted about five months, yeah, nothing real long, but it's not like it lasted two days and I jumped out. Now after that had ended, I was heart broken. Broken of spirit, everything. I was a bitchy, unforgiving, soul and I lost trust in everyone. Well it's been eight months, and I've healed. I trust people again, and I try to keep myself happy. Here's the problem, I told one of my friends that I was going to ask this person out again, and you know what happened? A full out war exploded. One after another people started yelling, screaming. I was making a horrible mistake they said, I was going to hurt myself and another in the process. Did I mention that I was told that someone liked me? I had always suspected, but they didn't confirm it until after my plans were set in action. While all this is going on, my best friend has been in their own drama. They liked a person, but then lost interest. Someone liked them, they dated them for like. They broke up within days. My friend got their feeling for the other back and asked them out. Then they ended it because they thought they lost their feelings again. Now, that ex was also my friend too, they're extremely upset. Now. My friend is the one that's threatening to kill me if I do it, but their ex supports my decision. Now here's one last twist. There was a point in time where my friend liked the person I love. We weren't very good friends then because well... you know. Now I want everyone's opinion on what I should do, including you, friend, person, ex and someone.

With Not So Much Love | Cold